Updates and nascent plans

Updating my list of events completed reminded me that there has been a haitus in my running that was not simply due to the upheavels of the last couple of years of pandemic effects but started before that. This year is something of a return to running events (much though perhaps I signed up to too many), and a attempted return to challenging myself to improve areas of my preparation for and participation in events. I have taken some old approaches to this and some new ones too, and happily for the moment things seem to be going in a good direction for me. Yes, I am managing niggles like the calf I had a small pull in warming up for a 20 mile race (a race that then didn't happen of course), and coping with what seems like everyone telling me "you have reached that age you know, shouldn't you run shorter events?". However, I plan to make the next 18 months a focused 18 months of better preparation to run and then see where I can get to.

To say I have plans for next year would be to mirror just about every runner looking to the horizon of better runs and races, but I am hoping to finally turn experience into wiser and more productive running (but not necessarily shorter running 😋).

Last day of 2020, 12 days of Christmas #day7, and RED January 2021

It is the last day of 2020... and it would be easy to say good riddance and jump onto the bandwagon of trying to bundle up occurrences of the last 12 months as if the flip of the calendar to 2021 will remove all the bad stuff. Sadly life is not that simplistic, and much of the changes 2020 brought will hang around in one form or another for many more months / years to come. There is way too much that I could write about the SARS-Cov-2 pandemic but I simply don't have the will to commit it all to a blog post, especially on a blog called 'on the move' which is ostensibly about following my efforts to get and stay fit. There has been acres of text written else where about the pandemic and other major world events I couldn't begin to do them justice.

What has 2020 been for me? Firstly a year of little blogging (well lets face it hardly any blogging at all), it has been a year of little running, and it has been a year of hard work at work responding to the changes of working from home. It was a change that I made well, perhaps too well, as I let it remove some of the base (hidden) activity from my day - the commute, the walking for lunch, going to shops on the way home, walking between meeting venues.... most all of that took place within a handful of metres of each other - commute = walk to front room, lunch = walk to the kitchen, shopping = all done once a week or online, moving between meetings = shutting one browser tab and opening another one.

2020 became the year of YouTube, as I found that I watched more than ever - Peter McKinnon, Matti Haapoja, Becki and Chris, Casey Neistat, Rich Roll, the minimalists, Matt D'Avella, Kevin Stratvert, The Body Coach, Yoga with Ness, to name just a few (I am not listing links, just stick these into the search engine if you are curious, though most are hardly niche, and have large followings).... don't worry though I have consumed lots of cinematography, vlogging, and camera skills videos I know my limits and won't be going all 'YouTube' any time soon.

So 2021... for me it has to be about me regaining and moving towards fitness again, a sustainable fitness, a fitness to live my own life relatively well... I have gotten shockingly far away from that this year and need to recover. There is the kind of fit for life stuff of glossy multimedia and then there is just the plain being fit to live your life... and I am solidly aiming for and in need of the latter. I need to be able to move without pain and aches, lift without worry, walk without being winded, run a short distance without difficulty. Yes, this year I got there, to the place of such poor levels of activity that my base / basic fitness all but completely dissipated. 2021 thus has to be about genuinely getting moving. So that is where my walking 5km or more a day started some days back, as that first small step, and today's instalment was as follows (borrowed from my Strava feed)...

The one with all the kilometres - 12 days of Christmas #day7 ("seven swans a swimming" - well no not today, too icy!)

On the seventh day of Christmas my true sent to me... a bunch of stuff we needed from the shop. It was in no no no way a way to sneak a long walk this morning while everyone thought I was simply doing vital shopping.

It was lovely out, if tricky under foot with cheeky black ice in places. Loads of people out again, and sadly too many groups thinking they can out wit the biological fundamentals of viral transmission which was... well anyway let's not get sweary or rant about their selfishness (there's twitter for that, apparently).

Ended up being a magnificent 7km because when I looked at the distance it really did beg to be rounded up again... honest!

... and to keep things moving tomorrow we start RED January... "This January, the RED community will be challenging themselves to get active every day. Whether running, swimming, cycling or choosing a favourite fitness activity, REDers will be going the extra mile to support themselves and others. Their fitness and fundraising efforts combined with your generosity will help Sport in Mind reach and empower people to experience the life-changing benefits of physical activity."

Whatever you are doing have a happy and safe New Year's Eve 🤗

Long walks and new tilt at the couch to 5k training app

Lockdown walking everyday

During the COVID-19 lockdown here in Wales we have been doing a one hour family walk as our one permissible exercise a day (before that was eased slightly to allow more exercise if needed). We have been very consistent with it and it has certainly paid off for the dog as we have covered more and more distance and more and more 'exciting' new routes. I only wish that the lockdown has done for my physique what it has done for the dag, she was badly ill just before the UK (belatedly) triggered the lockdown and so we've had the job of getting her back to fitness... she has done that and then some (she looks the doggie equivalent of ripped just now!).

All of this and the running below is being tracked by my Strava account, which for me has had something of a usage revival of late. Presumably Strava are one of those companies that have seen a positive impact upon business from the current pandemic situation.

Friday C25K week one run 1 - 3.39km 29:59

The one where he thought stuff this let's go!  I have been itching to over the few weeks but my foot (still rubbish) and the one exercise a day lockdown stopped me.

So I opted to restart the BBC backed C25K (this time with the DJ Jo Whiley narrating / coaching / coaxing), and so it seemed that I just had to go out and run. Having hooked up the wireless headphones and phone eventually and there was no other excuse really.  It was a gorgeous day for a run, and was only interrupted by me turning back to pick up a dropped card from inside my phone case, d'oh!  This time I'm making no comeback promises or goals, but run one get done!

Sunday - C25K week one run 2 -  3.71km

The one with the corrupted file (that I have had to delete) - this one was an interesting run where my GPS watch tried to tell the world that I had developed super powers and flown to southern Russia and back! The Strava track that I tried to upload and edit absolutely blew the calculations within my account to bits with records, times, and runs all going awry. So all I was left with was deleting it and entering a distance and time.

The actual run was quite different from the first and was more of a mental effort to complete, the new narration was helpful but I was aware that I was wrestling the instructions a bit. I think my body was also letting me know that this return to running though easy to imagine would be trickier to achieve. Still the GPS shenanigans afterwards made me laugh (in the end!).

Sunday - C25K week one run 3 - 34:51, 4.06 km

Had to delay the third instalment of my new couch-to-5k journey because of a foot injury caused by turning my ankle over during a family walk (!).  Basically I gave all of my ligaments in my ankle a nice wrench while on a gravel path, which was nice.

The eldest offspring (who has not gotten enough exercise, like most of us, during recent lockdown weeks - Joe Wicks has had his time in our house I'm afraid) said she was happy to come too and so we set out with me relaying the instructions from my headphones to her as we went.  She was very pleased with the 5 minute warm up and even more pleased to discover that my pace was considerably slower than she'd thought and that she could cruise along through the 60sec intervals.

We had good banter around the way and had to navigate a couple of unplanned turns thanks to the sunny weather bringing lots of people out onto the paths of the estate.  We were taking it in turns almost to spot a possible close pass and move us this way or that to make sure we were out of peoples way.  Think there were quite a few smiles from people recognising that a poor ole Dad was being shown how its done by a pre-teen.

By the end I think I may have found myself a c25k buddy, that I will believe that once we've done a few more (she is a pre-teen after all!?! hehe).  My foot seemed pretty well behaved although for some reason the pace was a bit quicker than I had originally planned.

So what happened that smashed a hole in my running year?

If I was to have drawn out my plan of the year it would look nothing like it has turned out. January began with a block of consistent running that was unprecedented in my lifetime, running everyday for 50 days blew away any previous 'streak'. From there I was really enjoying my running and thought that the year was going to be amazing in my running shoes, two marathons were coming next and I thought it was all systems go. Then, as if I haven't telegraphed it, the shoes fell off.

So whilst running a 20 mile race in March, my first one, I began to unravel. Sadly for me, it wasn't just hitting the wall it was race misjudgement, fitness misjudgement, psychological misjudgement and missed steps leaving the event behind. I'll get to each part in a moment but should first mention that the event itself was great, the organisation, support, course, and facilities were all en pointe... so what happened that smashed a hole in the rest of the year?

These four things were what left my running in tatters - firstly 'race judgement' - this was the simplest of the elements and not a unique one in any way... I went out too fast and gave myself a mammoth task in the second ten mile loop. I let, what my physio calls, happy legs run away with me, and although I wasn't far from my overall target time I ran the first half so quickly that the second half was always going to be a physical wrestling match. This played into the second component 'physical misjudgement' - running relatively shorter distances everyday for 50 days gave me a false impression of my base fitness. I had run longer sessions through that period but not with enough structure to give me the kind of long run endurance strength that I needed. Truth be told if I hadn't broken down over the twenty mile distance 26.2 would have undone me a whole lot more.

Fitness being an issue played into the third element 'psychological' - as I muscled my way through the second half pushing and cudgelling myself into getting it done I began to question myself, and question myself, and question myself. Before the end of the race I had verbally (and loudly) laid into myself for  being foolish enough to consider myself a runner... I took myself apart over my preparation, my physical condition, my belief that I was a runner, my lack of ability, my drawing down time from other areas of life to push along with misplaced goals,... it wasn't pretty, I wasn't kind, I wasn't logical, and trust me I used words that I wouldn't level at anyone else I've ever met or will ever meet. I pulled my stuff back together enough to cross the line trying to smile, but I had taken my sporting soul and popped it through a shredder. Suffice to say that I have yet to fully reconcile myself with that 5 minute self-flagellation.

Once over the line feeling mental numb and physically smashed I just wanted to get home, which meant I limped through the leisure centre it was based out of, collected a t-shirt, a drink, and then collapsed into the car to drive myself off to lunch as soon as I could. I didn't stretch, I didn't give myself time to sprawl out and relax my limbs, I crammed myself in the driving position and set off - the fourth element. On the way home I got stuck in traffic for 30 minutes and got back even more sore than when I'd crossed the finish line.

After that the marathons came and went without me bothering the start-line, the terrific physio4motion sorted me out with restorative stretches and exercises, but my running soul was cowering somewhere out of sight. I actually found for the first time in years that I didn't want to run, not that I admitted that to anyone. Running doesn't happen in isolation of course and there were huge things going on in my work life and the counselling room that added to the mess (other stories not for here).

So where am I now? Currently I am injured working through a round of plantar fasciitis which has evolved into some sort of a tendon issue in my right foot. I have run a 10k race with a friend which was amazing, and I'm not sure just what I am taking from the fact that I could go out and run in the middle of an injury, but that was likely an outcome of wanting to help someone complete their first ever 10k. Psychological I am still not "on it", but I am hoping that sorting out my foot will get me closer to running regularly again.

On the 2019 rollercoaster

This year started so very well with my running delivering great things, I ran everyday between new years day and Valentine's day before the wheels completely fell off my wagon. Not long after the streak and a few fun races I broke myself at my first ever 20 mile race. In the days that followed a hip issue left me barely able to get out of bed in the mornings, and so my running and mood plummeted. Roll on to now and my mood has not improved much and neither has my running - I now have a heel / plantar fascia issue on the foot of the opposite leg to the now resolved hip issue.

Suffice to say that I am desperate for a run, or at this point any other consistent physical exercise but it feels some way off. I am not done with running, I still have a lot of ambitions to do events and to do some events I have never tackled before. Something needs to change and I am wrestling with how to do that just now.

Running slow... really slow

I have run a lot and I have hurt a lot this year, I started the year with some monumental ideas and a training plan that took an age to craft but then I got injured. And so goes the story for so many runners, and moreover so goes the story for me on a pretty regular basis (you won't have to click too far back in this blog for proof of that).

So 2016 sucked, it sucked real bad! No, I am not about to launch into how many idols died, or start on about geo-political shifts... it was for me at a fundamental level awful. I now weigh more than I have in years, so much so that my body is hurting from the burden, and any life / work / activity balance has gone up in smoke. Hence a New Year uber-plan that went so spectacularly wrong, and looking at it in the cool light of reflection I know exactly why - I did not go slow, so now I have to go really slow.

I started out on the plan as if I had been running decent miles already (which I hadn't), it presumed fitness would return overnight (which it didn't), it assumed that I would see issues coming and fix them before any damage was done (which I didn't). Seeing as I have read so many running books and magazines which explain frequently about returning to running, the importance of incremental adaptation, the crucial need to take accurate stock of where you are in life before you start a running program of any kind, you'd think I might have avoided this phenomenon? No!

Looking at my 'running' now I have to slow done, so much so, in fact I have to... walk. I am trying to steadily increase my very basic fitness, upping my day to day walking, stairs climbed, and better food volume choices. Happily I am enjoying walking and have taken several 'power' walks in the last week or so. The other part of this approach is not running fast, I have now completed two parkruns staying deliberately within zone 2 aerobic heart rate, reasoning that if I run fast this heavy I it won't be a case of if I get injured but when.

All of this means that this years late spring marathon will now be a stepping stone to 2018, when I hope to be firmly back on track with running and a whole lot of other things.

Base! How slow can you go?

Right I am having to build this thing from the ground upwards, I am getting injured to often (I'm probably still carrying one with my last knee issue), I am way too heavy (for me), and training for events has just become a lottery (will I 'lose' my entry fee or not, will I be able to complete the training or not).

I ran for the first time in five and a half weeks the other day, I ran on grass, and I ran very slowly. Basically I opted to base train and thus keep my heart rate somewhere near what would appear to be my MAF (I have just started reading all things - maximum aerobic function). Afterwards my knee was not happy, so it will have to a slow phasing in of the slow running, and likely a trip to the physiotherapists office if I see no 'strengthening' or absence of niggles going forwards.

The joy of my second slow run (also on grass) was that it was a much better story for my legs, with no lingering twinges or aches afterwards. However, the actual heart rate part was a mess, I couldn't find a rhythm and so it was run / walk all the way with no sustaining of the run phases for very long at all. It was a sunnier day so may be that didn't help, perhaps I was stressing more about finding the sweet spot of running a good while at MAF, what it was I was frustrated. That said I am more determined to explore this stuff and carefully build a progressive aerobic base... I have a lot of reading to do.

Last week - 'recovery' after a half marathon

I can't say that I have worked out the best way to get over running a half marathon, and last week I tried something different. After running hard on Monday at the Milton Keynes half marathon, and beating my time from a month ago by almost 4 minutes, I opted to keep moving. Not running, but by walking rather than simply putting my feet up. At first it seemed to be working, but then my body let me know what it thought of the plan.

Through last week I began experiencing what I hope is runners knee and nothing more serious. Certainly my symptoms fit and my activities, before the pain and weakness in the joint definitely look like prime causes. After weeks of no running with my back problem I ran the Cardiff half because of an emotional need, and then found I could do some training afterwards, and then I ran another half... too much load to quickly on a body that during my back injury went about expanding in all the wrong ways.

Too much, too soon, well I have never done that before! Generally last week went well, knee aside, and this week whilst trying to curb my enthusiasm I'll be mixing good rest with a couple of sessions (though perhaps cross training and not running).

Ten year anniversary - on the move, or not?

Looking back at my blog it would be very easy to be confused as it pro-ports to be about movement and being on the move and so progress, whilst it is clear I haven't really made so very much. I am not, for example, now running sub-4hr marathons, or buzzing a near London marathon good for age PB.  There are cataloged here a number of failed rounds of trying to get 'fit' and pretty much failing at every attempt.

Reflecting on this apparent lack of progress there would appear to be a number of psychological conclusions that could be drawn - for example, sharing a goal taking the place of achieving it, as mentally I have perhaps felt rewarded simply for the process of typing a few posts and putting them 'out there'. Whatever truly is behind it is of course more tricky to define, as most often halts to progress stem from life, or work, or luck, or some such. What is true to say looking at this series of boom and bust endeavours is that the cycles are too short and too sharp, moreover they have settled into swinging around a constant average. Not an average happily that is moving in the wrong direction of unhealthy weight gain (or any other negative indicator), but it certainly isn't moving in the 'right' direction either.

It is fair enough that at the moment most of my times over most distances are still what they were 10 years ago in the face of an ageing chassis (in of itself I suppose a decent outcome of sorts). There is that feeling in me that somewhere the opportunity to run better times was wasted by bad habits and / or poor goal choice.

Am I lamenting and wallowing in self-pity? Well absolutely "yes", but in that lament some truths have become very very clear. The chief amongst these laments being the lack of consistency - the constant cycle swings of flirting with improvement and flirting with my old grossly overweight self. It is perhaps consistency that most people struggle with, we would surely all love to make progress in smooth linear progressions towards fitness goals.

2016 has not been kind so far...

2016 has not been kind so far, I completed my 12 days challenge around New Year and then tried to get going on half-marathon training. I found initially that my motivation was lacking and then in early February I did something to my back - I don't know exactly what. In the end I struggled on for a couple of weeks and then went to the doctor for an opinion, he ruled out anything other than a back problem and gave me some pain relief and advice to go away with (and the advice to return if there was no change). The result was virtually 8 weeks of nothing, no running, feeling sorry for myself, and getting heavy (not in a good way).

Along the way I had to miss my first go at the Admiral City of Newport half-marathon (Sunday 6th March) which didn't help my mood much. Eventually enough was enough and I just had to get out there and do something as I was desperate to run the Cardiff World Half Marathon Championships mass event this weekend just gone. All I had the opportunity to do was a fitness test to see whether it was even feasible to run, and then give it a go being as cautious as I could talk myself into being.

I was so desperate to run the WHMC event because of the untimely loss of two colleagues since the middle of December. Neither of them were close enough to be friends and I hadn't spoken to one for a couple of years, but the combined effect that they had on my career and the combined effect of their sudden demises left me wanting to do something.... run... run remembering them. I ran for charity in their memory but the money raising wasn't really the driver it was a more raw emotional thing (that I still haven't properly figured out).

After the event, my slowest ever, I feel a bit of the rawness has gone and more happily personally my body hasn't reacted as badly to running on no training as I'd feared. Indeed there have only been a few niggles in my back and 'just' the usual leg soreness. I might have gotten away with my stupid bullish emotional decision to run the thing.

I will try and get back on here some more as I do have other goals to chase this year, I just can't promise when. Hope your running has gone well.